Sometimes you just have to laugh at all of the ridiculous out there.
So you told them you want to have a baby. Yay! Having a baby isn't new. Millions of women have successfully gotten pregnant and brought babies into the world. You probably know a lot of them! So naturally, baby mommas new and old have a lot of pent up advice to dump on you. Get ready because you're about to hear the good, the bad, and the useless advice on HOW to make a baby.
Over my last 2 years of trying, I've heard a lot of advice! Most of it coming from places of love and support, and some of it coming from absolutely zero thought. Here is a list of my favorites.
the good
1. Trust your body. It's telling you things that you need to know, even if it's only whispering it to you.
2. Advocate for yourself. Friends, family, doctors, and me will tell you things, but that doesn't mean it goes that way for everyone. Be your biggest support for what you need and want.
3. Understand that much of this is out of your control, but not all of it is. Watch The Great Sperm Race. It will help you understand just how hard this is for everyone.
4. If you're seeing a specialist, schedule a check-in appointment every 3 months (if not currently doing IVF). This will help you feel proactive in "next steps" and the best part is, you can always cancel if you do get pregnant!
the bad
1. Drink a glass of wine every night. This is just a hard no to assume everyone even WANTS to do this.
2. Stop working out/doing physical activities Yes, it totally makes sense to stop doing the things that keep you healthy especially when you're not even pregnant yet!
3. Go on vacation and it will just happen Well, wouldn't this just be lovely? You know, because money grows on trees and all.
4. Don't waste money on pregnancy tests. Just use left over OPKs! Totally did this. Got my hopes up. Still got my period. A positive OPK at the end of your cycles DOES NOT mean you are pregnant. Get a pregnancy test!
the useless
1. Just keep waiting for a miracle. It'll happen...maybe!
2. Look at your predicted due date. That way you know when you'll be out of your first trimester and can feel good doing life again
3. Don't wait too long to start a family! Yea, this is great. I totally want to start a family before I meet the love of my life. Or have that conversation with them. Let's totally rush this process, it'll be fine because you're in your 30s!
4. Kids are so much more work than you realize. Enjoy the time while you can't have them. All I have to say to this is that if you know ANYONE who would say this to you as "advice" or to make you "feel better," you have my permission to throat punch them. In all seriousness, these aren't people worth having in your circle. They clearly can't empathize with what you're living with.
looking for more?
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